There are really not many words to describe this other than WTF. Apparently, Ronald McDonald wants to destroy Burger King. And uh, I guess the Mario Bros. want to stop him? Also, the Hamburglar appears. Just… wtf?
Category: Humor
Hilarious List of Video Game Sex Offenders
While sex offenders are in general no laughing matter, sometimes you can’t help but chuckle at dudes that might happen to look like Chester Molesters. Straw hat, Hawaiian shirt, sunglasses, binoculars and all, these dudes are easy to spot in a crowd. But what about in video games?
As we all know, gaming has more than its fair share of weird looking dudes. That’s why Destructoid has put up this handy list of videogame characters that look like sex offenders for all of us to look and laugh at. These are some of gaming’s ugliest and creepiest looking dudes by far.
Got any others to add to the list? I have to say that I disagree with Gordon Freeman, but the inclusion of both Marcus Fenix and Yangus from Dragon Quest VIII made me die laughing. Thoughts?
Source- Destructoid
The Wonderful World of RPG Cliches
I am a rabid fan of RPG’s, and have been for quite some time now. I love playing an engrossing story, leveling up, and collecting loot. While these games used to be priorities in my gaming schedule, they’ve gradually grown a little weak, and perhaps, a tad too predictable. Let’s face it, if there’s one thing that we know for certain about video gaming, it’s the basic generic plot that most RPGs tend to follow.
GamesRadar has put together a hilarious, awesome and totally accurate list of 30 Rules Every RPG Must Follow in an attempt to outline just how cliche the stories of these games have become. Everything from the hero’s village being destroyed all the way to the mythical “ancient race”, they nail them perfectly.
I’d have to say my favorite bit is the one about the family sword that is passed down from generation to generation that also happens to be the worst sword in the game. What were your favorites? And what’s the last RPG you played?
Source- GamesRadar
Debunking Video Game Lies
Remember back in the day, when there was nothing like PSN or XBox Live or Steam for you to monitor what your friends were doing and see their trophies or achievements? Back then, they could say whatever they wanted, and you had to take them at face value. There’s a dude named Ermac in Mortal Kombat, they would say. Or you can resurrect Aeris, they’d report. Lies!
Well, someone has finally decided to put a stop to all of the video game lies with the official Video Game Lies Wiki, which documents the many untruths that people cling to about their old favorites. It’s definitely interesting to scroll through some of the lists and see things that I recognize from my elementary and middle school days.
Definitely worth checking out. So which of these are familiar to you guys? Did you have that one friend (like I did) who always lied to you about things hidden in video games?
Source- Video Game Lies Wiki via GameSetWatch
GameCop Vs LameCop #5
GameCop vs. LameCop is a feature where Anthony and I argue about video game issues, playing the role of either the GameCop or the LameCop as we do so. We switch roles each time. The GameCop has your best interests as gamers at heart, while the LameCop is just what he sounds like: a total loser.
This week, we tackle several issues including GTA IV’s DLC dong, Resident Evil 5 and the problem with reviewing video games too early.
Do Video Games Prepare Kids for the Apocalypse?
Got to love the Onion, and their hilarious take on the ridiculous media taglines that seem to go along with video game coverage these days. In this skit, they ask the question if video games adequately prepare kids for the apocalypse, which as we all know is inevitable. Whether it’s zombies, radiation, or a combination of that and much more gruesome things, we do know that it is speeding towards us. Right? Anyways, watch the video so you can laugh and ignore the impending doom.
Today’s WTF: Man Takes Hostage With Sega Light Gun
Ah, the Sega light gun. What great games we might have played with you along the years for the Master system and beyond. We could play old school games like Gangster Town, Operation Wolf and even Rambo III. Apparently, we can also fool Brazilian police and take a hostage. Who knew?!
A few days ago, a Brazilian man took a 60 year old woman hostage a Sega light gun, trying to collect money back from a debt that was owed him. First he broke into her house, and then entered into a 10 hour standoff with police, before finally letting her go unharmed. I mean, really, the only damage he could have done to her would have been with the cord, I guess.
My question for this man is “seriously”? What did he even think was going to happen? This is truly WTF worthy, and I deem it so.
Source- Kotaku
Gaming’s Sweetest Records
Every hobby has some kind of weird record associated with it. Or at least, that’s what I like to tell myself. Whenever I go on a particularly epic gaming binge, I like to think that surely, someone, somewhere, has committed far more heinous deeds than I. This is how I go to sleep every night. Plus, I snore.
Anyway, I came across a list over at CVG of what appears to be a list of 30 gaming world records. Some of them are bizarre, and some of them are cool, but most of all, I find them terribly interesting. Did you know that the largest mass-participation LAN party was 203 people for 36 hours straight? That actually seems small to me. Or perhaps you knew that the greatest gaming setup is a dude that owns his own motion picture screen with theater sound? Or that GTA IV had a voice cast of almost 900 actors? Well now you do.
If you’re interested in those tidbits and more, be sure to check out the list. Kind of awesome. By the way, I think GamerSushi could totally beat that whimpy 203 person LAN party. So what was the most epic one you ever participated in?
Source- CVG
GamerSushi Asks: What Would it Take?
In every area of our lives, we’ve got limits and boundaries. Places we’ve decided for some reason or another we will never go. This turns out to be true even in the realms of video games. We tend to separate out between things we like and don’t like, things we are willing to try, and things we would never touch with a ten foot pole.
In “What Would it Take”, we ask you questions about your predispositions towards video games, and what it would take to get you to broaden your horizons, or move to a new realm that you’re not currently familiar with. Feel free to give as much or as little response as you want, we’re definitely interested in hearing why you game the way you do, and what’s keeping you from crossing these lines.
Continue reading GamerSushi Asks: What Would it Take?
Whitest Kids You Know: Call of Duty
Ah, playing multiplayer games online. They all come with their own shares of both joy and sadness. The Whitest Kids You Know dudes have made a new skit portraying these struggles in Call of Duty. It’s definitely a funny although depressingly accurate portrayal of online gaming. Makes you wonder how long we’ll continue to put up with these grievances, no? Anywho, do give it a watch, and laugh heartily.
GamerSushi Asks: Video Game Binges
I know we’ve had a feature on this before, but yesterday I went on a wild video game binge. I pretty much spent the whole day playing either Call of Duty: World at War or Civilization Revolution. It’s been some time since I’ve done this, and man, is it ever relaxing.
Basically, I spent almost a total of 10 hours rotating between solo and multiplayer on CoD, and playing a single player game of Civilization Revolution. Like I said, I don’t get to do that kind of thing anymore, so it really brought back some awesome memories. Some people don’t get that playing video games is a way that I majorly unwind when stressed, so the occasional binge is really just like therapy.
So, what was your last video game binge and what did it consist of? Go!
Today’s Foot-In-Mouth: Sorry, Treyarch
Yes. I’m going on the record. I’m apologizing to Treyarch. You see for the last year or so I’ve been on the bandwagon that Call of Duty: World at War wasn’t going to be very good, because it was made by Treyarch, and it was going to be set in World War II. I loved Call of Duty 4, so any departure from that game seemed to me to be a bad idea.
Well, I was wrong. I just had two epic 3 hour gaming sessions last night and this morning, and beat World at War. I have to say, that I was thoroughly impressed, and agree with almost all of Sean’s review of the game. I’d easily give the game, based on the campaign, a B or B+, even. It was great, and in particular the Russian/German levels were a joy to play, if a tad difficult towards the end.
So, does anyone else want to join me in apologizing to Treyarch?
Why Are Gamers Such Crybabies?
I am a man of passions. I mostly love things more than life itself or hate them with a fury that borders on the wrong side of psychotic. But even I am taken aback by the wrath that seems to regularly appear from gamers on the Internet. Perhaps it just that the Internet has given these people a voice. Or perhaps gamers are the biggest bunch of babies this world has ever seen.
Continue reading Why Are Gamers Such Crybabies?
Alec Baldwin and His Wii
I think Alec Baldwin is one of the funniest people on the planet. If you haven’t seen 30 Rock, you really need to go check it out, as it’s maybe the best sitcom on TV at the moment. He appeared last night in a Wii-related skit on Saturday Night Live last night that is crude, possibly NSFW, and also awesome.
Try not to laugh during it. Go ahead. I dare you.
The Halo RPG Video
Heck, they already made a Halo RTS. Why not a Halo RPG, Final Fantasy style?
While this video isn’t terribly original, it’s pretty well done and mildly entertaining. A bit too long though. The trick to a good short is knowing when to stop the joke, and these guys kind of went overboard. All in all, it’s worth a watch.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_CtNE0qjSDU[/youtube]
Adam Sessler Responds to Fanboy Wars, Is Pissed
Wow. Adam Sessler is a super nice guy, at least from the time that I met him at PAX. He was super busy, and in a rush, but took the time to talk to me and even accepted a business card from me. Super swell fellow.
Well, this happy-go-lucky man is a bit pissed off in the newest edition of “Sessler’s Soapbox”, in which he responds to the fanboy wars between XBox 360 and PS3 fans after X-Play’s review of Killzone 2. Basically, after the review, people accused XPlay of being biased towards the 360, and also of lacking integrity, for getting paid off to review the game the way they did.
The best part of all? They gave the game a perfect score. Yeah. I can see why he’d be pissed. He really gets going by the end, too.
Retro Nintendo Customer Service Training Video
I love when all things retro surface again on the Internet, rising from their graves like some unholy zombie minion, ready to slay us with laughter and tales of times gone by. Today’s particularly retro minion comes courtesy of a 1991 Nintendo training video that helps people deal with customers with defective (or supposedly defective) products. Ah, remember back when that Nintendo seal meant something? Good times.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WYjgHLFZMa0[/youtube]
Sup Chief, Episode 1: Mister Chief
I’ve posted a few videos by TheDuoGroup, some of my favorite machinimators. Well, they’re now breaking into the live action realm with a new Web series called Sup Chief?, about a group of guys that gets a new famous roomie from the Halo series. This first episode has its moments, but I’m really curious as to how they’re going to stretch this into a series without the premise getting stale. I’m sure they’ll figure it out.
Left 4 Dead Valentines Equal Time 4 Love
As some of us men with a ball-and-chain (love you sweetie) know, Valentine’s Day is coming up just around the corner. Yes, that commercial holiday in which the meaning of romantic love is boiled down to buying each other trinkets and doodads.
However, if you’re feeling a bit out of sorts, and are looking for the perfect way to tell that special someone how you’re feeling, then fortunately, there’s a solution for you. And yes, it does involve zombies. Left 4 Dead valentine cards!
Created by a Penny Arcade forum goer, these guys kind of rule. I’m a sucker for puns, and these are about as silly as they come. My favorite is the tank. Anyone else know of any other good gaming related valentines?
Source- Penny Arcade forums
GameCop Vs LameCop #4
GameCop vs. LameCop is a feature where Anthony and I argue about video game issues, playing the role of either the GameCop or the LameCop as we do so. We switch roles each time. The GameCop has your best interests as gamers at heart, while the LameCop is just what he sounds like: a total loser.
This week, we tackle several issues including Nintendo’s Wii Motion Plus, Ubisoft’s shady DLC and Sony’s penchant for starting the hype train too early.